Help for someone you know
You have probably come to this page because you are concerned about someone in the family or a friend who you think has a problem with alcohol. We hope we can help.
If you have already visited the “Alcohol, help for you” section of our website, you might have noticed that there are (very broadly speaking!) two types of problem drinking; and these are “binge-drinking” (which you probably associate with the pictures of people falling out of pubs drunk on a Friday night), and the ongoing drinking, often at home, which can lead to health problems and possible alcohol dependency.
In any case, if you are concerned about someone close to you who is drinking too much it is undoubtedly causing distress, or maybe anger. There are certain kinds of behaviour that people often react with. It might help you to read this:
Denying – Pretending that the problem isn’t there and ignoring it.- Enabling – Inadvertently supporting the alcohol use by paying off debts; by tolerating behaviour which most people would find unacceptable; or by buying alcohol for the person.
- Controlling – Trying to control the person in an attempt to forcing them to stop drinking.
- Apathy - Giving up.
People often go through these stages, so if you can identify with any of it, it is normal.
What should you do?
Try and empathise with the situation of your friend or family member. Depending on the circumstances that might be the last thing you feel like doing, but overreacting or shouting very rarely works.
In the meantime, there are two other areas of this site worth exploring:
How do we talk to people who are using alcohol?
If you take a look at our “About Us” page, you will get the sense of the way we try and approach working with people who are drinking excessively. Our “alcohol, help for you” page is worth looking at too. These might help you to think about how you can approach the matter with your friend or family member for the best.
So how can we help you best?
If you would like to talk, please contact us. You can tell us about the situation and we can try and give you the “tools” to help you manage the situation.
Sometimes people almost force their family or friend to our front door. This rarely works. Years of experience have taught us that people only start to make changes when they decide they want to. So by all means encourage them to make contact with us. Let them read information on this site. Give them our contact details.
If they are accepting of it, we can arrange for a “family session”, so that both you and your family member can attend and see one of our staff. Remember though that both you and your family member need to be willing for this to take place!